Support your Intense gifted/2e kid

Is this program appropriate if I have a young child or a teen?

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This program is designed for parents of intense gifted kids ages 2-18.  The key principles you’ll learn are relevant throughout the lifespan - so if you’re a grown-up gifted kid, you may even use some of them to support yourself.  I have a background in child development and I've helped parents with kids ages 2-18, so I’ll help you understand how to adapt the strategies for different ages.  You can continue to use the strategies for years to come.  

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Does my child or teen need to be officially identified as gifted for me to participate in the coaching program?

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Your child does not have to be officially identified as gifted, as long as you strongly suspect your child is cognitively gifted or advanced.  If you have any questions about whether the learning lab is a good fit, please contact me directly at danika@giftedlearninglab.com to set up a time to chat.

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I’ve already read a lot of books and articles and listened to a lot of podcasts about gifted kids, intense kids, or parenting.  What’s different about this program?

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(1) Everything is designed specifically for parents of intense gifted and twice-exceptional kids.

 

Perhaps you've had this experience - you hear or read about a parenting idea that seems great, but when you try it with your child it falls flat, backfires, or seems to create more difficulty. This experience is super common for parents of intense gifted/2e kids, and it doesn't mean there's anything wrong with your execution (or your kids!). You need strategies and problem-solving help tailored to intense gifted/2e kids like yours.

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In Support Your Intense Gifted/2e Kid, all of the information and strategies have helped other families with intense gifted and 2e kids. I’ve been working directly with these kids and their families for over 20 years as a teacher, tutor, therapist, psychologist, and now a parent coach, so I have a lot of experiences to draw from and adapt. I also was an intense gifted/2e kid and now I’m raising one, so I get personal practice adapting strategies in real time! 🙃

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I designed Support Your Intense Gifted/2e Kid so more parents can get access to the ideas and strategies they actually need.

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(2) You get a lot more hands-on support and guidance.

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A parenting strategy or idea is only helpful if you can figure out how to apply it to your child and your family. As you know, I write about parenting strategies and ideas every week in Gifted Lab Notes. Some weeks, you might feel confident using the ideas from Gifted Lab Notes right away. Other weeks, you might wonder how the idea would work with your child...or whether you'd need to adapt it. You might wonder if the idea could help with your biggest concerns...or if you need a different approach for that particular situation.

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Take a complex child + other family members + ever-changing stressors - that's why even smart, intentional parents often feel stuck when they try a new parenting approach with their intense gifted/2e kid - or when they have to decide which strategy to try in the first place!

 

I designed Support Your Intense Gifted/2e Kid to be highly interactive, so you'll get lots of help applying and adapting the strategies we discuss.

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The program seems like a big commitment - is it worth doing this now?

 

I designed the program to be highly interactive and supportive. There's 2.5 hours of live meeting times with me and your small cohort each week, and I know that's a substantial time commitment.  

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Yet - many participants say that this program has actually saved them time.

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Our Learning Lab meetings provide the critical information you need about the week's topic, so you can start to make changes right away without additional research or reading. I help you understand what underlies your child's intensity, and I help you shift your parenting in small ways to create more connection and ease.

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Most parents I work with are in one of two spots, and both groups find that the program saves them time.

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(1) Some parents have known their kid is gifted or 2e for some time, and they've done a lot of research to understand giftedness, autism, ADHD, or their child's other exceptionalities. Despite understanding their kid's brain, they still struggle with daily parenting interactions. They know their parenting approach isn't working, but they can't find clear guidance about what would work with their kid. These parents appreciate the concrete parenting strategies and all the help adapting techniques to their particular situation. They save time by finally learning strategies that work for daily interactions. They spend less time in trial-and-error, and less time responding to meltdowns, arguments, power struggles, and other conflict at home.

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(2) Other parents have recently learned that their child is gifted or 2e, and they feel overwhelmed by everything there is to learn about their child's brain and needs. Many of these parents have also been craving a new approach to parenting, but they haven't known where to start. These parents appreciate that the program provides a simple, clear framework to understand their child's new diagnosis and what their child needs to thrive. They save months of time spent researching and searching for clear information. They also appreciate the concrete parenting strategies and the way I tie the strategies to gifted/2e needs.

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What if I can't attend all the Learning Lab meetings and Office Hours live? Will I still get a lot out of the program?

 

All of our live meetings are recorded, and you have access to these recordings for 6 months. If you watch a recording and have a question, you can ask questions at any time during the program in our private Mighty Networks forum and I’ll reply with a video. Participating asynchronously won’t be quite as immersive as participating live, but through Mighty Networks you can get a lot of asynchronous support and coaching from me and interact with other families in your cohort as well.  (You also get two private coaching calls during the program, which you'll schedule at a time that works for you.)

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Some parents in past cohorts were not able to attend the Tuesday meetings, but watched the videos each week and attended the Friday Office Hours as much as possible. The Office Hours meeting is fully interactive and gives you time to ask and discuss questions in real time with me and other families. Parents who missed the Office Hours meetings said it was still very helpful to watch the recordings.

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You’re welcome to join from work, from your parked car, while watching your younger child (I’d recommend headphones), or while your kid uses a screen. If you can figure out a creative way to join, you are welcome to join however works for you!

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Is there a payment plan?

 

Yes, you can pay the fee in 5 monthly payments instead of a single payment. There are no additional fees to use a payment plan.

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Do you have experience with...

 

...queer, nonbinary, and trans kids and teens? Teens with long-standing mental health challenges? Single-parent families? Kids with sensory sensitivities? Kids with chronic health conditions? Kids with significant anxiety, depression, panic attacks, somatic symptoms? Kids who use medication for ADHD, anxiety, or mood? Preschoolers and kindergarteners? Public schools? Private schools? Homeschooling?

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The answer (to all these, at least) is yes! I've been working with gifted/2e kids and their families in a lot of capacities over the last 20 years, and my private practice is focused on these types of families. I used to teach middle school and I learn a ton from my teen clients. I have an intense gifted 4 year old at home and I run a free discussion group for parents of bright kids ages 1-5, so I've learned a lot about gifted/2e intensity in this age group (in addition to my training in general child development).

 

I love to research and do deep learning dives on all things related to gifted/2e kids, so that includes neurodiversity in general, LGBTQIA+ identities, anxiety and depression, burnout, family stress, sensory sensitivities, chronic health conditions, school issues of all types, and more.

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If you'd like to know whether I have experience with some specific aspect of your child's experience or your parenting concerns, feel free to email or schedule a chat! It makes sense you'd want to know that before we work together.

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Is this program therapy?

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No, this group coaching program is not therapy and is not a substitute for therapy or a professional relationship with a licensed mental health professional.  During group coaching lab meetings, you'll reflect privately on your own experiences, strengths, and challenges - but we won't spend time exploring any participant's personal psychology in depth with the group or with me.

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If you or your child are already participating in therapy services, this group coaching program can be a great complement to your personal therapy work because it will give you a gifted-specific framework to understand your child and improve your family dynamics. 

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If at any point during the group coaching program you realize that your own or your child's anxiety, sadness, history of trauma and stress, or other mental health challenges are affecting your ability to use the new information and strategies you're learning, I'd encourage you to seek out therapy services to get additional personalized support.

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What if I have some issues with the terms “gifted” or "twice-exceptional"?

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You don’t have to be completely comfortable with the labels “gifted” or “twice-exceptional” to benefit from this program, as long as you see your child as bright or as intellectually/academically advanced.  During this program, you’ll get a chance to understand giftedness in a new way and learn more about what giftedness means for your child.

 

The term “gifted” has a complicated and problematic history.  Historically, IQ testing and gifted programs have been used to support eugenics, racial stereotypes, and inequities.  Yet some children from all races, ethnicities, and socioeconomic situations are unusually bright and advanced.

 

My view of giftedness is this: giftedness isn’t about being better, it’s about being different.  And I believe it’s important to acknowledge when a child is bright or gifted because we have to understand a child accurately to support them well.  For gifted kids, knowing they’re gifted helps us make a better fit between their environments and their unique characteristics.  

 

If you don’t believe that gifted or high-ability children sometimes think and process the world differently than typically developing children, this program probably won’t be a good match.

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What if I have some issues with the word “intense”?

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If the descriptions at the top of this page resonate with you, this program will probably be a good fit even if you don't love the word "intense" or if you prefer other words to describe your kid - like passionate, energetic, sensitive, assertive, independent, strong-willed, or curious.  

 

I chose the word "intense" because it resonates with many parents whose gifted kids feel deeply, think deeply, and notice things that others don't. 

 

In this program, we'll look at "intensity" in a new way that highlight your child's strengths and helps you identify successful strategies to support them.

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I think "intense" can be a useful shorthand, but it doesn't capture all the nuance and individuality of a child's strong feelings, thoughts, or behaviors.  In fact, I wrote a brief article about the word "intense" - how it can be validating or invalidating, depending on how it's used.  I also list some other ways to describe apparent "intensity."  Check it out here if you're interested.

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My intense gifted child is autistic, has ADHD, or has a learning disability like dyslexia.  Is this program designed for families like ours?

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Absolutely!  I have a special interest in twice-exceptionality and Support Your Intense Gifted/2e Kid was designed with twice-exceptional kids in mind.  I strive to make all the approaches and strategies neurodiversity-affirming and appropriate for twice-exceptional kids.  We also spend significant time helping you adapt the principles and strategies to your specific child's neurotype, personality, interests, and other characteristics. 

 

I have a lot of experience supporting families of intense gifted kids who are autistic, have ADHD, and have learning disabilities or sensory sensitivities - as well as supporting the kids themselves.  I am continually learning about neurodiversity-affirming approaches to parenting and coaching as well as the lived experiences of neurodiverse folks of all kinds.

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If you're interested in the program and want to learn more about supporting your twice-exceptional kid, I would love to have you!

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My intense gifted kid is a PDAer (has a persistent drive for autonomy / pathological demand avoidance).  Or, I've noticed that they have a lot of PDA characteristics.  Is this program a good fit for families whose kid is PDA?

 

Yes!  I've been learning a ton about PDA over the last two years and my own kid has PDA characteristics, so I understand many of the constraints inherent in parenting a PDA kid.  As I learn more about internalized PDA, I recognize my own internal PDA experiences as well, so I bring a lot of compassion and intuition to my work supporting PDAers and their families.  Every cohort of Support Your Intense Gifted/2e Kid has had at least one family with a PDAer, and often multiple.  Every week, we talk about how to adapt the new approaches and ideas to support kids with PDA characteristics specifically.  In my experience, most intense gifted/2e kids benefit from PDA-informed approaches, so these are highlighted throughout the program.

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In terms of specific training, I've completed the PDA North American Certification Program - Level 1, the Therapists and PDA Masterclass from At Peace Parents, and PDA: Not What You Think It Is! from Dr. Donna Henderson and Neurodivergent Insights.

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What’s the refund policy?

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This is an all-in investment.  There are no refunds after live meetings have begun.  You’ll be learning a new framework to help you understand your child better, feel calmer as a parent, and bolster your support systems.  The 8-week group coaching experience walks you through this framework and gives you the tools you need to make real, lasting changes in your parenting and your family.  This is vulnerable, exciting work.  I want you to be fully invested in the process so you can get the most out of what the learning lab has to offer.  With this policy, you’ll know that your labmates are as invested in the process as you are.